Relief

Everything went well with my meeting at work and I still have a job!!!

I'm thinking that I want to look for a new job but at least I still have one while I look for a new one!!!

My Weekends

Some of my family flew into town on the 13th of this month. I was able to get some time off work to spend time with them. I got a whole weekend off the 17-20 to be with them. My sisters in-laws have a second home in Salt Lake that they let us stay in.

I don't think Kittie had ever seen a suitcase before. She really enjoyed playing in my luggage while I packed.

Our first day in the Salt Lake house my older brother flew in. I hadn't seen him in a few years and it was really nice to see him. I got to talk to him a little bit alone while the rest of the family went to the grocery store. My older brother, Danny, and I were the closest growing up. We are the most alike and we are also the closest in age. Danny has been inactive from the church since he graduated from High School and he assured me that he was not critical of what happened with my marriage. Even though my divorce was back at the beginning of March and my relationship with Carlos started shortly after, most of my family doesn't want anything to do with him. It was nice to have at least one family member be supportive of my choice of life style.

That night we went as a family to see Harry Potter and the Half-Blood Prince. I had already seen it but I was still excited to see it again. I didn't enjoy it as much as I did the first time but it was still a fun family outing. The next day I went to the Hogle Zoo with my parents and my niece and 2 nephews. It was fun. I hadn't been to a zoo since I was in elementary school. We got to see lots of fun animals.

We played lots of games together as a family and on Monday the 20th we celebrated my little brothers 21st birthday. After the birthday dinner I took my mom, grandmother and 2 brothers to meet Carlos (they were the only family members that wanted to meet him). Everything went really well and everyone really liked him.

I went back to work on Tuesday and became very depressed. There was a huge project that had been given to us before I went on vacation but we couldn't get to it before I left. I came back from my trip to see that it hadn't been touched and nothing else had been done either. I started working on the project hoping that my co-worker would help when he came in. I ended up doing the whole project and then some all alone. My co-worker didn't lift a finger. I worked my butt off for 3 days doing EVERYTHING!!! On Thursday I had had it with my job and my co-worker and I stopped working when my shift ended. However, Carlos hadn't left to come get me yet and so I decided to stay on the clock and continue working until he showed up. My co-worker was really pissing me off so I went to the back stockroom when I noticed that Carlos was calling my cell phone. Being angry, depressed and over worked, I answered my phone to talk to him. He tried to calm me down and tell me everything would be okay. The conversation lasted 10 minutes or less and I left to go home when he arrived. On Friday afternoon they called me into the office and gave me my finally warning about my phone call I took the previous day. I was sent home and given 2 paid days off to think of a plan of action to improve at my job. I went home furious and crying cause they obviously don't see all the behind work that I do. I could go on forever about all the politics and injustices that go on at my job but that would take a really long time. Carlos comforted me as best as he could and sent me to go spend time with my family. I drove to Salt Lake and toured the Beehive House with them. It was nice to be with family and it gave me something else to think about.

Saturday I went to a family reunion at my grandparents in Tooele. I didn't want to go originally cause my grandparents made it very clear that Carlos was not welcome in their home and I was offended. The only reason I went was to spend time with my parents before they left. Sunday was my newest nephews baby blessing and that was enjoyable. I spent the entire day with family and they all left to head back to Houston today.

Today was my last paid day off work since my warning. I can either call them and say that I no longer desire to work for the company or write a plan of action to present to them. If I go with the plan of action route they can decide whether or not to keep me. If they keep me I have to be perfect for 6 months or I'm terminated on the spot. I have decided to take my chances and write a plan of action that I will be presenting tomorrow at 1 pm. Hopefully they will be willing to take me back. I don't have another job in line and Carlos can't pay my bills forever. Please keep me in your prayers and wish me luck!

His Name Starts With "C"

I took this quiz on Facebook that told you the first initial of the person's name that loved you. Usually these quizzes never give you the answer you want but this one amazingly did! The answer was "C" which is awesome since I'm dating Carlos! It really made me happy when the results showed up. You may be thinking that I purposely answered the questions to get that answer. Well you would be wrong! The questions were stuff like: What is your favorite color? What time do you go to sleep? What is your favorite kind of movie? What is your favorite type of music? What is your favorite thing to do? etc....

How does one get the letter "C" from the answers I gave to some of those questions? I have no idea but I don't care! It gave me the right answer...or at least the answer that I wanted!!

Yeah!!!

Harry Potter and the Half- Blood Prince

I took my little brother, Chaz, to see Harry Potter and the Half-Blood Prince tonight at the 7:00 showing. Let me just say that it was amazing. There were a lot of funny parts in this movie but there were also a lot of emotional ones too. I actually cried at some of the scenes. I don't know if it is because I have read the books and I know the story or if the music in the back ground was impacting my mood. Probably both...and being on my monthly didn't help the cause either. For anyone who has read the books..I don't think you will be disappointed in this film. As with most movies that are made based on a book...things were taken out and events changed. Even though these things happen with films I think they did a really good job with this one. I can't wait to see the movie again. I just wish I could convince Carlos to go with me!

Enjoy the movie if you plan on seeing it!

Too Much Grease

I would like to start this post by confessing something.

I haven't been going to church for months. I think the last time I went was back in November. Don't ask why...I just don't want to go but I will probably start going back in the future. I need to wait until I'm ready though.

I spend my entire day on Sundays with Carlos. It is the only day that we both have off work. Sunday is Carlos' ONLY day off during the week and so he likes to just be a bum. I don't mind being a bum with him cause at least we get to be together. All we do is sit on the couch and watch TV and movies all day. We even take a few naps most of the time.

Carlos finally wanted to take me out and do something fun together. He decided to take me to Sunday Brunch in Sundance. I was so excited to finally do something other than being a bum. I got all pretty since this was going to be our first outing together since we have been together. I was surprised to see him when he came out wearing a wife beater and shorts. Not exactly what I had in mind since I had wanted to take pictures of us in Sundance. While we were driving he told me that he didn't want to go to Sundance anymore and that he wanted to take me to a little crack in the wall cafe in Heber. I had really wanted to go to Sundance but Heber sounded nice too. We got to the Hub Cafe and the sign said, "We ain't hooters girls but we're the next best thing." I was a little nervous and Carlos teased me that the girls served topless. Turns out they were just a bunch of white trash girls. Nothing to worry about and they were all completely clothed.

So I have fallen in love with Carlos' omelettes and I decided to order a omelet here. We both got our food and ate. My food was extremely greasy. I'm not used to eating things with so much grease. I don't know if it is because I'm getting older and my body can't take it anymore or if it's because I don't eat greasy food anymore. Carlos cooks most of the food that I eat and nothing he makes is greasy. Everything is grilled or fresh. I was fine for a few hours but by the time we got back to his place my stomach was hurting SSSSOOOOO bad. I felt so sick that I couldn't even move. When I woke up this morning to get ready for work my stomach was still bothering me. Carlos told me to call in sick and so I did. My stomach is feeling better now that it is late afternoon but I don't plan on eating anything greasy again!!!

Going Bold

I'm one of those people that doesn't like to take many risks in life.

Growing up my mother always trimmed and cut my hair. I never had a stylish or fancy hairstyle when I was going to school. It's not that I didn't want to have a stylish look...my mother was too frugal to take me to the salon. However, my sister was allowed to get professional haircuts growing up. Not sure why she was allowed to and I wasn't. Anyway...the summer after I graduated from high school my sister paid for me to have my hair cut and colored by her hair dresser. I got some layers and mild highlights. I loved my hair. I moved to Utah a year later and started going to my sisters hair dresser. I consistently got my hair layered and colored. I was too much of a wuss to bleach my hair until almost a year and half ago.

Now many of you know that I almost always get the same color and cut every time I get my hair done. I always have the swoop bang and just barley this year started getting it cut in a shorter bob. I have decided to go bold and try something completely different.

I want to get bangs that go across my forehead instead of the swooping ones.

Not only do I want to try a different haircut but I want to try a different color too. This is the really bold part since I have always done shades of blonde.

I really want to try red or auburn!!!

Relax....I'm not going red all over! I'm thinking about still going blonde but adding some red highlights to the top.

I really like the coloring in this picture but I will probably go for a color more like this...
or even this...

I'm thinking that I will still look good since I kinda have strawberry blonde hair naturally.

I'm not so sure if I will do this look yet because my hair lady is out with a new baby and I will be using someone from the salon that she recommended. I would rather be bold using a hair person that I trust. But we shall see...I'm really wanting to be different now and express myself differently. I need a change!

Will I need to color my eyebrows though?

Our Love Bonsai

Several months ago Carlos texted me and told me he bought a tree. I was extremely confused and didn't ask much. When I picked him up at work that day he was holding a potted juniper bush.

He was excited to tell me that he was going to make a bonsai tree for me. I was surprised to find out that he knew how to make a bonsai. I had plans to visit my sister that night so I left him alone with the bush. When I came back to see him the tree was almost done.

I was so proud of him. He worked on the tree for a few days and this is how the tree has ended up looking after he trimmed it down.

Isn't it pretty? My man is so talented!!

The night that Carlos started on the tree he told me that the tree was "Our Love Bonsai" and that we both needed to take care of it. If any of you have seen How To Lose A Guy In 10 Days...they have a love fern and it ends up dying because of neglect. Carlos took really good care of our tree until he got his promotion at work. Work became more time consuming and our tree began to die. He made me feel bad cause I wasn't taking the time to water it and give it sun. I didn't want him thinking that that was how I thought about our love so....I started to take care of it. I would put it out on the balcony and water it on my lunch break everyday. Carlos started taking care of it too. Our brown bonsai started to come to life again cause we were both taking care of it. The tree is turning green again and we are beginning to see new life on the dead branches. It is making me really happy to see it doing so well again!!

I think it is very symbolic of our love for each other. Carlos works an average of 7o hours a week and I don't get to see him nearly as much as I would like to. Sometimes I doubt that I our relationship will work. Around the time that the tree was dying was around the time I was debating on whether or not to stay with him. I care so much for him and I can't bare the thought of losing him. I feel as though my life would cease to exist if he were no longer there. He works these long hours for his son and also for me. He wants to make good money to take care of the people that are important in his life. When I came to the conclusion to be patient with him and communicate my feelings, our relationship blossomed again. Our tree turned green when our relationship grew stronger. We are both really working on being the best we can be for each other and therefore we are both working on making our tree stronger. Kinda cheesy but very true.

So You Think You Can Dance

I didn't think I could possibly find a TV show that I liked as much as Dancing With The Stars but I think I found a match. So You Think You Can Dance is Amazing!!! I've been watching it since they finished the auditions and started the show with the top 20. All 20 dancers were amazing and it is really hard to pick a person to vote for. Every week I vote for someone else. On Dancing With The Stars I pick the person I want to vote for after week one and I consistently vote for that person the entire season. With So You Think You Can Dance I change my mind every week. Because they are all amazing dancers I have to base my vote decision on the choreography. Their fate relies entirely on the choreography for me. So it really sucks if they pick a really sucky dance and the choreography is weird or lame. Lucky for them I was a dancer and I know what is difficult so I might be kind to some of the dancers if they were good even at a sucky dance.

So far my favorite couple is Evan and Randi!

They consistently amaze me week by week. They always perform perfection in my eyes and I think they have the best chemistry. Besides that...Evan is a Utah boy and so I have to vote for him for that reason. Good thing he dances so well. Randi really captures the character she is portraying. I think she does the best at capturing the essence of the dance! Their Samba tonight was HOT cause of Randi!

Melissa and Ade are really good too. They are my second favorite couple in the show. Melissa is a ballerina so...naturally....I would like them. Last week they did a classical ballet piece from Romeo and Juliet and it was absolutely gorgeous. Melissa is just amazing. Her waltz this evening was just beautiful. Ade has horrible foot work and he has absolutely no turn out but I like him cause Cameron liked him. He still is an amazing dancer though.

Brandon and Jenette are my third favorite couple. They cease to amaze me week after week. Brandon reminds me a lot of a guy I danced with when I was dancing and that brings me comfort. They also perform flawless and I have loved all their dances.

Caitlin and Jason are amazing dancers individually but I don't think they have great chemistry at all. The first week they did a Bollywood dance that was phenomenal. I fell in love with them at that moment. However, they have not captivated me since that dance. They get worse and worse and luckily they escape elimination each week. Tonight they performed a Fox Trot that really impressed me. Best dance they have done together.

Jeanine and Phillip are so cute. I love them as a couple. Jeanine is fabulous and I think she is absolutely gorgeous. Philip is the best hip hop dancer out of all the dancers. However, he has a hard time adapting to the other styles of dance and it drags the couple down. They did a traditional Russian dance that the judges hated, but I loved it cause I know how hard some of that stuff is and I thought Philip was amazing. I hope he keeps stepping it up cause I really like them as a couple.

Kayla and Kupono are my least favorite couple on the show. I can't stand Kayla at all. She really gets under my skin. She is probably the best female dancer out of all of them but she annoys me for some strange reason. Kupono is probably my favorite guy and it saddens me that he is partnered with Kayla. They performed a piece tonight about addiction. Kupono was the addiction and Kayla was trying to get away from it. I didn't particularly like the choreography but I loved the story of the dance. They both put so much emotion into it and it was fabulous.

I love this show and I look forward to watch it every Wednesday. Next week they switch partners and I'm excited to see who everyone gets partnered with!!

Bye Bye

Cameron left this morning to go back home to Oregon. I can tell that Carlos is sad to have his son gone. He really wants him to come back for another month in a few weeks. I enjoyed having him here and spending some time with him. I wanted to do more with him but he has a really short attention span and he gets bored quickly. I had high hopes of taking him to the zoo, Seven Peaks or Lagoon. None of those things worked out. His aunt beat me to the zoo and the amusements parks didn't seem to amuse him cause he didn't want to go somewhere crowded. I ended up taking him to the swimming pool twice and that was fun. The first time we went to the pool there were some other kids there for him to play with....the second time we weren't so lucky. I felt bad cause we didn't have any toys but I found a hair clip that we used for a diving toy and he seemed to enjoy our little substitute. My favorite part was taking him to see Up in theaters. I think we bonded the most on that outing and I got to play parent. I don't have children of my own yet so it was fun for me to play a parent figure. I was really nervous to meet Cameron cause I knew Carlos would be watching to see how we got along. I knew that our meeting would play a huge part on a future with Carlos. I think things went really well between us. Carlos told me that Cameron really liked me which makes me feel great. Apparently Cameron didn't like Carlos' ex-girlfriend at all. Kudos for me!!! I will be excited to see him when he comes again and hopefully we can do more than just play video games and swim!

My 4th of July

My 4th of July started with me going to work at 9 in the morning. Management at Macy's really sucks right now and so the pin head of a manager that I have didn't get anyone to work during the day with me so I worked on a holiday by myself until 3:15. Lucky me right? I finally left work at 5 and headed over to see Carlos and Cameron. I can't actually remember what we did after I got there. I know we played a little Guitar Hero and we probably watched some TV. We decided to watch the fire works from the Stadium of Fire so we headed off in the car to find a nice hill to watch them from. We found a nice hill and watched the fire works and then we went to get some fast food to finish the celebration. So my 4th of July wasn't the best ever but I got to spend some time with the man I care about and his son.

How was your holiday?